There's a name I am extremely familiar with. So familiar in fact that I'm kind of over it. The name is "Me". A few years ago my staff team had a joke regarding a band we had heard rehearsing. We kept hearing the lead singer say, "Can I get a little more me in the mic?" "Can I get a little more me in the monitor?" "A little more me, please?" Over the past little while I have been listening to the Lord say to me, "This life is not all about you." Don't get me wrong, I know He adores me. I know He cares and pursues. But I've seen too much of ME over the years. Recently I went on a cruise. The cruise was a gift and one night while watching the sunset I was thinking about Jesus and wondering what if He had come to Earth with a "ME" mentality. How different life would be. I think about Philippians 2 and how He made himself nothing and humbled himself to death and not just any death, but death on a cross. And the Father gave him the name that is above every other name. A name greater than "Me". A name greater than Obama or George. A name greater than Osama or Haggard. A name greater than Billy Graham or Mother Theresa. Greater than Tim Keller or Larry Crabb. A name of the one that one day I will have the joy of seeing face to face.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kma2VTeTuoE
I've realized more lately that my longing for Home has increased. For years I have wrestled with this strange sense of sadness and restlessness that usually comes everyday around the hours of 5PM-8PM. I've often attributed it to winter, a draining time in ministry, singleness, whatever is about ME. My sweet sister even made me a hilarious CD several years ago called, "5 to 8" with lines from Christmas Vacation, dance music, and a variety of entertaining musings. Well people, I've had an epiphany (which most of you would say "duh" to). I think no matter what happens in my life, dreams fulfilled, a life lived to the fullest, community, etc. that I will always have that slight sadness or restlessness. Why? Because it is a very real reminder that I am not Home yet. It reminds me that there is a greater invitation Jesus offers to us than just having a "good life". I think I would be bored. So this invitation continues..............
As I think back over 2010, I could not be more grateful for the journey and the process. The first half was brutal and the second half involved a skip in my step and a song in my heart. Crawford Lorritts says, "Sometimes your hope has to be threatened in order for it to be strengthened." True dat, Crawford. I wonder what invitation Christ will extend to me in 2011? Will I lean into it? What reminds you that you are not Home yet? Above I copied a youtube video of a song I literally have been hopping around to all day. Pretty funny sight when one is wearing an ugly black boot for leg issues, but nevertheless it is a powerful song. I can't wait to worship face to face with Him and with YOU beside me.
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
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2 comments:
thanks for that reminder!
hm...so the sadness is normal?? wow, that's good to know...praise the Lord this life isn't what we're living for...miss you Beth
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